Changing is hard.
Now that I'm back in this "I'm going to lose weight mode", I've been obsessing over what I eat. I don't like eating at all honestly because it makes me feel fat and bad about myself once I'm done. I shouldn't feel like that though because I'm not eating bad foods. I guess I just feel that no matter what I eat the calories won't be burned so I'll be fat either way. I'm not as big as I could be but I'm big enough to want this change. Seeing pictures of fit girls in their bikinis at the beach makes me want to work even harder. Never in my life have I felt confident in my bikini. I want that. I want to be able to just walk around the beach without covering up and worrying over what people see what look at me. I brought my workout clothes and shoes to my dads house this weekend. Hopefully I won't be too lazy to workout. I plan on walking/jogging around the neighborhood. Maybe I can find someone to go to the rec center and ...