Failure At Its Best....
I know one of my goals this month wasn't to weigh in until the last week
or day, but I really wanted to know if I had made any progress at all. I
haven't. It is because I binge. The other day my boyfriend and I went
to red lobster...that was dumb. But I didn't even really eat that much. I
got the popcorn shrimp with broccoli and side salad. I ate all the
salad, almost all of the broccoli, and there were tons of shrimps left
over. There have been other days too. I don't know why I think it's okay
to eat this crap when I'm trying to LOSE weight. I'm so excited about
nursing school, maybe that is why I'm eating all of these no-no foods.
It may also be because I have stopped exercising as much as I want to. I
wanted to start jogging or going to the gym, but I would have to go by
myself and I don't want to look weird or anything jogging all alone.
Plus I don't want to get snatched up by some creep. I was so determined
to have some one go with me, that I bought a pump for my moms bike tires
so she could ride her bike while I jogged beside her. But that didn't
happen because other stuff came up and she got busy and so on. I have
to get better results for this month. I really want to break the 150's
this month but that isn't going to happen if my fat ass binges and eats
junk food and keeps drinking sweet tea....I have to learn to put that
shit down. I want to try drinking nothing but water for the rest of this
month. No flavor packets or sparkling waters. Plain H20. I'm so tired
of being angry and crying because I see no changes. It is all my fault. I
can't blame others for my binging and laziness. It's time to step it up
(for real this time) and kick this fat in it's ass. No more binging or
excuses for not wanting to work out by myself. I'm going to do it and
that's that.
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