School Stress

     Work gets in the way of a lot of things. School just so happens to be the one thing it always interferes with for me. I was looking at the fall semester schedule for the general biology class I need to take just in order to take Microbiology. The days work out great. There is a Monday-Wednesday class in the evening just in case I don't pass my cna exam on time. But the lab is only offered in the morning or during the time on day when I would have lecture. What kind of crap is that? That doesn't help me out at all and I'm not ready to take Anatomy and Physiology 1&2 yet so that is a no go. So I went ahead and put Child Psychology in my cart just in case I fail the state exam. The only issue with me taking Child Psychology now is that it will throw me off and add another semester to my schooling because I planned on taking that and Social Ethics in the same semester.
     Today at work I looked at the calender trying to  figure out when my last day would be if I passed the state exam on the first try. This makes it hard because I don't know when my exam will be. I'm guessing my last day will be around somewhere around August 16 but that isn't set in stone. I guess I'll just have to wait and see how clinical goes and what not. I'm pretty excited to start the clinical portion and learn to actually work with real clients in a facility. Work is really stressful on top of school and my grandma being in the nursing home. Every time I try to start homework or practice skills someone calls or walks in. I practice at my house more often now too. Regardless whether someone volunteers or if I'm imagining a patient laying there, at least I'm practicing.
     After not getting checked off on the transfer belt skill last night, I'm kind of second guessing myself about becoming a nurse aide and registered nurse in general. I felt great passing all the skills up until now when I missed this one. It discouraged me. It made me feel worthless in a way. I felt like if I can't pass a skill on the first try I suck, which I know isn't the case. It's not like I didn't know what I was doing at all. I just forgot to say some things required in order to pass the skill properly.  At least my instructor was nice enough to tell me my mistakes and let me try on some other night in the very near future. I'm going to nail it next time around and that is a promise I made to myself. I know deep down I will be a great cna. I'm still learning and I'm only human so I should expect for myself to make some small mistakes. I need to stop worrying about people in my class watching me too. That makes me feel really anxious. I have to become a cna. This desk job is getting more and more agitating.
   
     

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